The Body’s Story: How the Nervous System Holds Trauma When Words Can’t

(IFS + Somatic Healing at Connect Heal Grow Psychology) Most of us have moments when our body reacts before our mind catches up — a familiar sign of how trauma stored in the body can show up in everyday life. You’re washing dishes and your chest suddenly tightens.You get a text from someone and feel […]

When Pleasing Others Means Losing Yourself: How People-Pleasing Affects Relationships

Two people sitting back-to-back in silence, each looking distressed, symbolizing the emotional disconnection that can result from people-pleasing in relationships.

If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing everything right in a relationship — being helpful, accommodating, easy to be around — and still ended up feeling lonely or unseen, you’re not alone. In this post, we’ll explore how people-pleasing affects relationships, and why this protective part of you can unintentionally block the very connection it […]

Recognizing People-Pleasing in Adulthood — From the Inside Out

Woman holding a smiling mask in front of her face while looking sad, symbolizing the emotional conflict and hidden struggle of people-pleasing in adulthood.

In our last post, we explored the roots of people-pleasing — and in this one, we’ll look at what people-pleasing looks like in adulthood, including the behaviors, emotions, and relational impacts this pattern often carries. But what happens when that same protective part continues into adulthood? Have you ever found yourself saying yes with a […]

How People-Pleasing in Adulthood Begins — and Why It Makes Sense

Child gazing out a window with a soft reflection, symbolizing early emotional sensitivity and the roots of people-pleasing behavior.

People-pleasing in adulthood often feels automatic. You say “yes” before you’ve had time to check in with yourself. You offer support, soften your voice, suppress your needs — not because you want to manipulate, but because some part of you learned that keeping others happy felt like the safest path to connection. This post explores […]

How to Stop People Pleasing When You Want to Say No

A woman holding a megaphone and a sign that says “Stop,” shouting with determination—symbolizing the act of reclaiming one’s voice and setting boundaries.

There’s a part of me that has worked tirelessly for as long as I can remember. It watches closely. It anticipates what others might need. It says yes when I want to say no. It smiles when I feel like crying. It tries so hard to make sure everyone is happy with me—because deep down, […]

What Your Feelings Are Trying to Tell You

Colorful round emoji faces representing a range of emotions from anger to joy, arranged beneath a gradient scale from negative to positive—highlighting how emotions are often labeled and ranked rather than understood as equally valid.

The Problem with Labeling Emotions We live in a world that loves to label feelings. From a young age, we’re taught to see emotions as either “positive” or “negative.” Joy, excitement, gratitude? Good. Anger, sadness, fear? Bad. These labels shape how we view our inner world—and they place a limitation on how we experience our […]

How to Feel Safe in Your Body After Trauma: A Somatic and IFS Approach

When we talk about healing from trauma, we often focus on processing painful memories, reshaping narratives, or creating healthier relationships—and while all of that is important, there’s one foundational piece that often goes overlooked: feeling safe in the body. For many trauma survivors, the body has not always felt like a safe place to be. […]

Overwhelm: The Push, the Freeze, and the Crushing Weight

An illustration depicting the feeling of overwhelm: people rushing to meet deadlines, a large hourglass running out of time, a packed calendar, and individuals struggling under pressure. Represents the push to keep going, the freeze from stress, and the weight of burnout—key themes in Internal Family Systems (IFS) work on overwhelm.

The Experience of Overwhelm I know overwhelm well. It’s not just a clinical concept or something I help my clients navigate—it’s something I experience, too. Like so many of us, I have parts that push me to keep going, to check one more thing off the list, to be productive even when my body and […]

Feeling Stuck? How IFS Therapy Can Help You Move Forward

A turtle flipped onto its back, struggling to regain its footing—symbolizing feeling stuck, overwhelmed, and unsure how to move forward.

Have you ever felt like you’re spinning your wheels but not getting anywhere? Like no matter how much effort you put in, you’re still in the same place? Feeling stuck can be frustrating, confusing, and even disheartening. It often comes with a sense of helplessness, as if something is holding you back, yet you can’t […]